Posts

Showing posts from 2013

Emotions and Self-Worth

So this post is divided into two parts based on some major thought processes that I have had these past couple of days. I feel like there should be some sort of relation between the two but I don't want to make them related and try to force causation. In any case, the first regards the issues stated in my previous blog post about SAD and the second concerns a concept that revisited me with great force during my church today. #1 Emotions Writing about my Seasonal Affective Disorder  has been such a huge blessing for me as an individual. In doing so, I was able to just let it all out. It was a needed release. Since that point, I have been making more of an effort to remain in control of my life and my feelings. I have never tried this hard before, but I guess that it a good thing. Maybe I am finally progressing. Well, I have learned something:  It is hard to be totally in control. I say this because of an experience yesterday. Waking up I felt confused about a lot of differen

My Yearly Battle With...

I don’t expect you to understand. Very few people ever will. My actions, my thoughts my feelings. In my life, all of these are always dictated by me…well, almost always. You see, there comes a time each year when my body succumbs to life’s pressures in a way that is almost completely uncontrollable. That said it is time for me to come clean about something that I have battled for a while. An occurrence that for so long has caused me to label myself as weak. My battle is with Seasonal Affective Disorder commonly referred to as SAD or Winter Depression. I don’t expect you to understand. I don’t expect you to care. I do expect that you will have patience. As a child, my personality radiated. Full of excitement, laughter, and energy, I was my parents’ greatest joy and favorite terror. Keeping active in my young age also kept me busy and gave me a social aspect to life that is necessary for children. I was a gymnast. I had a place in something important. It wasn’t long before I gav

Survival in Auschwitz

Image
Survival in Auschwitz by Primo Levi My rating: 4 of 5 stars In the midst of the hardest known physical struggle, a myriad of lessons were learned. It is no surprise that during the most inhumane event in recent history, humanity and its opposite, dehumanization, were the basis upon which hope was maintained. The message of the book revolves around keeping that one attribute that keeps us not just living, but alive. This attribute is our own human-ness. To take care of oneself when there is no other reason to. To eat with the possibility of no other meals. To look forward to a tomorrow that may not exist. To keep hope whilst believing there is no change in the future. As the master of destiny, in line with a little bit of luck, Primo Levi offers this historical biography of his feelings and stories from the Holocaust concentration camp. After being captured in Italy, he was transferred to Auschwitz where he remained until "the end". This is not a masterful piece of literat

Candide

Image
Candide by Voltaire My rating: 3 of 5 stars To start off I must say that I read this book for a class that I am in. This may skew my rating because of my dislike of being forced to read. To me reading is a pleasure that ought not to have time constraints. That said I thought that this book was rather good. The highly graphic nature did contribute to the satiricism that Voltaire employed. To some it may seem too graphic but to my semi-desensitized mind I found the entirety of the plot, including the heinous descriptions of death and other afflictions intriguing as the moral of the story developed. From my interpretation, and possibly only because I am in school and a pivotal time in my life to receive this message, I felt that it was a call to good works and a well developed work ethic. At one point it depicted a happy family that worked together and had few worries. Why were the few worries? Because they knew how to work and made happiness for themselves. I am not sure whether I b

What is going on?

The title says it all. I really have no idea what I am doing with my life right now. I have been skating by on the sheer thought that I am in college. That is what I am doing right now. But what about later. Later is becoming sooner. Sooner than I have expected. There is so much to do and I just want to get started. I have recently been overwhelmed with a desire to move on. I am tired of working for my undergraduate degree. My living situation, though some changes have occurred, is still quite monotonous. My town is cold. My job is common. And I feel like I have met everyone I want to meet and done everything that I want to do here. I am ready to get out and start. Visions of Kansas or California, Knoxville or Newport, provide adequate images to keep me sane and my motivations up. I feel like I have always wanted to grow up. In my mind I have thought of "the age" as that point for people. It looks like that is holding true for me. That is how I fell about myself anyhow. I

The Magician's Nephew

Image
The Magician's Nephew by C.S. Lewis My rating: 3 of 5 stars It was a good book for a beginning of a series. I felt like there was a little too much authorial interaction. It got to the point that I just wanted the story. Also, there was a lot of going back and telling of things that happened earlier that weren't said. I think it could have been organized better but I am not the author. The parallel to the biblical version of the Creation was rather interesting and there are many great quotes that I intend to reference. Overall, it was a good book but I am hoping that the rest of the series is better (as many say that it is) with less commentary from the narrator. View all my reviews